48 Things I Wish I Knew as a Teenage Girl

  1. Your mother is always right, no matter how much you don’t want to admit it.
  2. You should learn how to cook at least one meal.
  3. Those 5 or 6 Oreos won’t kill you – eat them while you still can.
  4. Being a nerd is more attractive than purposely acting stupid.
  5. You won’t miss the party of the year just because you decide to stay in one weekend.
  6. Most people drink in college, but it’s okay if you don’t.
  7. In moderation, alcohol isn’t poison.
  8. A man that doesn’t respect your decision not to have sex is not worth your time.
  9. Sexism still exists – never stop fighting for what you want.
  10. You won’t automatically gain the freshman 15 just from drinking a couple of beers and binging on pizza every now and then.
  11. Running sucks, and there are so many other ways to stay healthy and exercise.
  12. Brussel sprouts don’t suck as much as they did when your mother made you eat them before you left the dinner table.
  13. Bubble baths are not just for babies.
  14. No one will remember or care what clothes you wore to school.
  15. College is nothing like your high school english teacher says it is.
  16. You shouldn’t have sex in high school – not for a religious or moral reason, but because it’s inexperienced. Men don’t understand how to make it a pleasant experience until you’re older.
  17. Your number doesn’t mean shit.
  18. Every person who enters the women’s bathroom gets their period. You don’t have to try and muffle the sound of your tampon wrapper.
  19. It’s not the end of the world if you miss a practice for an after-school sport.
  20. College is so much better than high school.
  21. Most of the friends you have freshman year of college won’t be your friends by senior year and that’s ok.
  22. You don’t have to be friends with everyone and it’s ok if you’re not loved by everyone.
  23. Bars are not the place to meet quality men.
  24. Your mom’s cooking really isn’t that bad, especially compared to dining hall food.
  25. Making money during the summer is a lot more important than taking days off to work on your tan.
  26. A tan isn’t worth the risk of getting cancer and using a tanning bed wastes a lot of money.
  27. Being an undeclared major is almost smarter than coming into college declared – most people change their major anyway.
  28. It’s ok to quit a club because you don’t like it anymore, even if you hold a position of leadership or authority.
  29. Taking a personal day every now and then won’t ruin your GPA.
  30. Ben & Jerry’s can heal all wounds.
  31. Wine has the same power.
  32. If your friends don’t like your boyfriend, they’re probably right about him.
  33. Everyone gets zits.
  34. Remembering to wear your retainer every night may be a pain in the ass but you’ll be thankful when your teeth stay straight.
  35. Coffee is not bad for you, it is not disgusting and it is 100% worth the risk of stained teeth. That’s what Crest white strips are for.
  36. Breakfast may be the most important meal of the day, but sometimes it’s not doable. Keep snacks in your car.
  37. Sleepovers suck. Don’t be angry when your mom says you can’t go.
  38. Your siblings will be your biggest allies in the future – don’t burn bridges.
  39. Always have an umbrella handy and dress in layers.
  40. Bagels don’t cure hangovers – iced coffee does.
  41. Sit near the door in class if you’re hungover.
  42. Never leave the house for an extended period of time without a phone charger.
  43. You have your entire life to make your own rules so abide by your curfew. Staying out past 10 isn’t worth the consequences.
  44. Never go shopping when you’re hungry.
  45. You don’t have to be nice to everyone – stand up for yourself.
  46. Don’t buy every “required” textbook for a class.
  47. Don’t get caught up in all the crap life hands you, because in 5 or 10 years it won’t be relevant. Live a little and enjoy the time you have.
  48. Nothing will make you happier than doing what you love.

An Open Letter To My Older Sister

I remember the days where I used to tell you I hate you more than I love you. It was never that I actually hated you – it was always out of jealousy.

I used to spend hours searching your room trying to find your diary, hoping to get a glimpse at the life you had. Compared to mine, yours always looked better.

You were allowed to stay out until 10 p.m., which to a 9-year-old was pretty awesome at the time. You played spin-the-bottle with boys while I was still calling them “icky.”

You were always smarter than me, and you had 4 more years of experience than I did. Your writing was beautiful, you knew how to put on makeup, you learned how to drive first, you had a boyfriend first – you did everything first.

And here I am at age 19 and I still envy you. The only difference is that since I’ve matured, I won’t pinch you or call you names because of it – I’ll just work harder to become half the person I know you are.

Most of the time I watched you grow up and succeed. But sometimes I watched you fail. I watched your heart break, I watched the ever-present smile fade from your face, I watched lock yourself in your room to cry because you didn’t want anyone to see.

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What Does Being a Bonnie Really Mean?

The age-old question at St. Bonaventure University is, to put it bluntly, what the fuck is a Bonnie? If I know one thing, it sure as hell is not a wolf.

Like many other prospective students, I was fed the “it’s a wolf” answer and immediately googled it. I searched, but to no avail.

After going to Bona’s for at least a year, students start to put together what being a Bonnie really means.

The problem is, there isn’t one definition of a Bonnie.

To one student, it means being part of a team. To another, it means pulling fellow underage Bonnies through the window at the Burton. It could mean holding the door for an outrageous period of time, waiting in line for a Hickey omelet, spotting one of the Dev bats, midnight breakfast, wasting all your money on drunk Mangias, or chuckling about the fact that we’re too under-enrolled to keep Francis open.

But what about those Bonnies who don’t drink? Or the ones who don’t play sports? Or the ones that never lived in Dev, or never went to midnight breakfast, or never ate a Hickey omelet?

And what about the Bonnies that went here before us?

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Why I Won’t Apologize for Not Wanting Children

I don’t ever want to have kids.

*Insert horrified gasp or dramatic eye widening here*

I typically don’t get a positive response when I tell people that I can’t picture a future where I ever have children.

What I do get is a lot of, “you’re only 19, you’ll change your mind.” I’ve also heard, “I said the same thing when I was your age and now I have (insert number here) kids!” The ever so charming, “that’s so selfish,” has been said a lot, or my favorite, “you’ll change your mind once you meet the right person.”

What does the “right person” have to do with my decision to carry a child inside of me for nine months anyway?

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Dress For Success, Not Stress

I have never worn a pair of sweatpants to class, and even yoga pants are a rarity. I own one pair of leggings and one sweatshirt, and it’s not even a hoodie.

I completely understand that this isn’t the norm – that most college students who have an 8:30 roll out of bed at maybe 8:10 and throw on the clothes that most resemble pajamas.

And there’s nothing wrong with that. Lazy days happen to the best of us. At some point during the year we’re all caught wearing a hat hiding the hair that we neglected to wash for two days. It happens.

But I always make it a point to try and dress the best I can every day. As I said, some days it’s a struggle and I’m lucky if I make it to class in a hat and jeans. Other days, I’ll be wearing a dress and heels.

Success is all about the way you present yourself to others. It’s not as superficial as appearance and looks, per se, but it’s about the way you portray your image.

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Confessions of a Girl Who Hates Going Out

A typical weekend at St. Bonaventure University involves booze, boys and bad decisions.

Every night is basically the same if you really think about it. First is the pregame, which consists of the same 5 drinking games that deal with either cards or pong. The same 20 most popular pop or rap songs play in the background and the people at the pregame are typically the same group of people every weekend.

Then comes the dreaded walk. Continue reading